


Rings

by Peaceful_Warlock



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec is curious, Caring boyfriends, Cuddling, Cute, M/M, Magnus blocks out his childhood, Malec, Rings, alec asking questions, alec loves all of magnus, deep chats, healthy relationship, identity struggle, magnus has walls, talks about Magnus' past
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-19
Updated: 2017-08-19
Packaged: 2018-12-16 21:14:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11837178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Peaceful_Warlock/pseuds/Peaceful_Warlock
Summary: Alec and Magnus are cuddling when Alec decides to ask about Magnus' rings.





	Rings

**Author's Note:**

> Just a nice fluffy fic about Magnus sharing some of his past with Alec :)

It's around 3pm and the sun is seeping in through the drapes in Magnus' living room. The two of them lay curled up in each other on the couch, soaking up the sunlight.It's been a long time since they've both had a day off together.

Magnus closes his eyes against Alec's chest and breathes him in. At the same time Alec reaches for his boyfriend's hand and pulls it up, intertwining their fingers.

He stares at their hands whilst stroking over the back of Magnus' with his thumb. The warlock hums contently before shifting slightly to look up at Alec's face, then at their clasped hands.

"What are you looking so intently at, Shadowhunter?" Magnus smiles as he asks, clearly amused by his boyfriend's fascination.

"Hm?" Alec responds blankly. "Uh, I was just wondering about your rings." He brushes his other hand over the 'M' and 'B' rings on Magnus' hand. Then, he brings their hands to his mouth and kisses his boyfriends' knuckles.

Magnus smiles fondly at the memory. "They were given to me. By the silent brothers that took me in, on my 18th birthday." 

Alec's eyebrows raise as he realises how long ago that must have been, despite the fact he doesn't know exactly how old Magnus is. Regardless, he finds it hard to imagine his boyfriend as an naive teenager, how different he must have been.

Magnus is looking at his own fingers now in contemplation as if he had completely forgotten the rings were there. "It was when they gave me my name." He continues.

Alec realises he'd never really thought about Magnus' real name, to him, he's just Magnus. He's unsure if he should ask in case it's too personal for the warlock to want to share. Regardless, he does.

"What's your real name?" Alec chances, brows furrowed.

Magnus breathes in deep. "That..." he begins. "...is something I've never told anyone."

"Do you think you ever will?"

Magnus turns to face Alec completely and cups his face, stroking his thumb across the shadowhunter's cheekbone. "One day," he starts in a loving tone. "I'll tell you."

"Oh, you don'y have to-" Alec begins to explain, worried he's pressured Magnus into sharing something he's not comfortable with.

"I want to." Magnus cuts him off, looking at Alec's whole face, all over. Then, he leans forward and presses the softest of kisses onto Alec's lips.

Alec can't help but smile into it. Can't help but feel privelidged to be the first person this magnificent warlock wants to share his real name with. Even if it's not today. Someday. "Okay." He agrees.

He feels Magnus' leg work it's way in between his own thighs, resting there, making him feel complete and content, curled up around the man he's in love with. Magnus lowers his head again and snuggles into Alec's chest. Their hands still intertwined.

"Why do you still wear them?" Alec asks, curious of the deeper meaning behind the pieces of jewelery.

Magnus inhales, thinking about how to answer. "They remind me that I'm choosing to be the person I became after they were given to me. Not the one before." He puts quite simply. "I don't like to dwell on the bad experiences of the past. And the ones before I was given these rings...are some of the worst."

Alec feels instantly sad, remembering bits of the stories Magnus had told him about his unfortunate childhood.

"So, that's why you never take them off?" Alec asks gingerly.

"I suppose. I don't really think about it. I like the identity they give me. A different one from which I was born. A better one." He sounds almost resentful which Alec understands.

"Magnus, tell me if this is out of line... but isn't it better to embrace every part of yourself...the good memories and the bad?"

Magnus remains silent with a deeply pensive look on his face. Alec starts to worry he's been too intrusive.

"I just mean- it's okay to let in that vulnerable part of yourself." Alec says gently before kissing the back of Magnus' head.

A small smile plays on the warlock's face as he wonders if this 23 year old has more wisdom than most centuries old warlocks.

"You're very wise for someone of only two decades or so." Magnus remarks. He then sighs, realising Alec probably wants a more meaningful response. He lies facing Alec now, looking into his hazel eyes trying to make him understand. Understand that vulnerability is something he'll never let back in. "To be vulnerable means to be weak, Alexander. And I vowed to myself all those centuries ago that I would never be weak again."

Alec squints slightly, obviously needing more explanation. Magnus continues. "That's why I seldom talk about my weakest moments...from that time of my life. Not even with you." He reaches out to brush the hair from Alec's forehead. "When I told you about what happened to my mother and- and my stepfather...I forced myself to relive it all, all over again, to let in that broken-hearted teenager with no control over his emotions or his powers." He looks down, away from Alec's inquisitive eyes. "He doen't exist anymore."

Alec places his fingers under Magnus' chin and lifts his head back up to meet his eyes. "Hey, that's not something you should have to block out. It's a valid part of who you are. A part of you that I would love regardless of how much it scares you." Alec smiles and comfort radiates from his face, through his eyes, reassuring Magnus that everything he hates about himself is still worth loving.

Magnus can't help but fall into what Alec's telling him, despite his better judgement. He wants to believe Alexander with all his heart. It's been so long since anyone took the time to tell him it's okay. Okay to feel what he's terrified of feeling. Against his will, his eyes become glassy and threaten to give away his emotions.

"You don't always have to have these walls up, Magnus." Alec says as he grips their hands together tighter. He starts to fondle the rings again and Magnus thinks he knows where this is going. "You don't always have to remind yourself to forget."

Magnus watches, almost as if from outside himself, as Alec starts to pull the rings, one by one, off his fingers. Magnus can do nothing to stop it, he's not sure if he wants to. He just knows he trusts this man in front of him more than anyone or anything in the world.

Once the rings are off, Alec looks across at Magnus and sees the watery-eyed, wary vulnerability he's seen so little of so far. His heart swells as he falls in love with this part of him instantaneously.

Magnus looks at his bare fingers and thinks about the same bare fingers he saw everyday throughout his adolescense. Before his new identity, before Magnus Bane. Then, he looks at Alec and the look of pure love on his face, and realises if this beautiful, strong, young shadowhunter can accept the memory of a broken  young warlock, then so can he.

"I love you." is all he can say.

Alec brings Magnus' hand towards his mouth and kisses where his rings were just moments before. "I love you, too."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
